Fatherless Pt. 1:

Written by: Abraham Aguirre

When I hear the word “father” my memory races two years back into my past. It was in 2012 that my father acted on the plans that where boiling inside of him for years. Let me share, it is so commonplace to hear about a rebellious teenager running away from his or her parent’s home. However, in my home, “in a blink of an eye,” what is commonly assumed in our culture took a one-eighty-turn in my family. Sadly, my father moved out of our home leaving my brother, mother, and myself behind. The first year of his absence was a season of confusion, sorrow, and anger for my family and me. I felt like I was thrown into a pool, learning how to swim for the first time. There I was flapping and screaming in life's pool of troubles, I felt like giving up and drowning.

Unfortunately, I had to take on my father’s role and it was a difficult task. I can recall moments of financial struggle, fear, and a mountain of stress. How would I make it? How will I make ends meet? Were just a minuscule of the thoughts that would flood my mind. I would work hard for rent, food, and our basic necessities. I remember having to deal with overwhelming emotions. For instance, there were moments at work where I had to rush to a restroom to simply weep. In this process of becoming the man of my house, I longed within for my father’s guidance and wisdom. I yearned for his affirmation and simply to make him proud, but abandonment and silence is all I received.

Although, it has been a rough journey, this season of being fatherless was a good learning process. I didn’t have anyone to look up to as the man of my house. But there was God—my last resort. I received love, affirmation, praise, and guidance from Him, He became the father I never knew.